Family Holidays: How to Remain Sane When Staying With Relatives
Spending time with family this Christmas? Make sure your visit is festive rather than fraught, with these tips and ideas
With families spread far and wide these days, visiting family over the holiday season often means more than a simple day trip. But staying with your in-laws or returning to the home you grew up in for a few nights can involve its own unique stresses.
Organising the journey, transporting family and presents, squashing up in the spare room, and spending long days indoors with the rellies is not always a recipe for a good time. So before you load up the bags and head on to the airport, check out these seasonal ideas for preparing and enjoying a Christmas or a New Year’s away.
Organising the journey, transporting family and presents, squashing up in the spare room, and spending long days indoors with the rellies is not always a recipe for a good time. So before you load up the bags and head on to the airport, check out these seasonal ideas for preparing and enjoying a Christmas or a New Year’s away.
Channel your inner child
The holidays can be a time to stop being a jaded adult and get back in touch with your inner child. Reconnect with all that’s fun, celebratory and jolly about the festive season by joining in party games, playing music and eating your favourite food. See the magic in the Advent calendar and a decorated tree and appreciate the extensive Christmas to-do list your host has likely wrestled with. You could even leave a stocking out…
The holidays can be a time to stop being a jaded adult and get back in touch with your inner child. Reconnect with all that’s fun, celebratory and jolly about the festive season by joining in party games, playing music and eating your favourite food. See the magic in the Advent calendar and a decorated tree and appreciate the extensive Christmas to-do list your host has likely wrestled with. You could even leave a stocking out…
Travel well to arrive happy
A stressful journey can banish any holiday cheer and set the holiday off on the wrong foot. Ideally, leave home during comfortable hours for the station, airport or car trip, and try to arrive at a pleasant hour that is not too intrusive for your host family.
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A stressful journey can banish any holiday cheer and set the holiday off on the wrong foot. Ideally, leave home during comfortable hours for the station, airport or car trip, and try to arrive at a pleasant hour that is not too intrusive for your host family.
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Focus on what you have
At some point during the festivities, step back and take a moment to observe everybody in action. The scene may be slightly shambolic, but it’s yours, so enjoy all the people and activity going on around you and try to see it all through forgiving eyes.
At some point during the festivities, step back and take a moment to observe everybody in action. The scene may be slightly shambolic, but it’s yours, so enjoy all the people and activity going on around you and try to see it all through forgiving eyes.
Anticipate issues
Most of us have experienced enough family holidays and Christmases to be able to anticipate the problems that could arise. Does your dad buy terrible wine? Take a few nice bottles yourself. Perhaps your aunt forgets you’re vegetarian? Drop her a line to gently remind her before you leave. Do your kids always go loco around 3pm? Arrange for them to sit quietly with a film at this point in the day, and take a tablet or laptop along so they can watch it without disturbing other people.
You don’t need to trample all over your host’s plans, but guessing where things can come unstuck and being prepared in advance can really help on the day.
Most of us have experienced enough family holidays and Christmases to be able to anticipate the problems that could arise. Does your dad buy terrible wine? Take a few nice bottles yourself. Perhaps your aunt forgets you’re vegetarian? Drop her a line to gently remind her before you leave. Do your kids always go loco around 3pm? Arrange for them to sit quietly with a film at this point in the day, and take a tablet or laptop along so they can watch it without disturbing other people.
You don’t need to trample all over your host’s plans, but guessing where things can come unstuck and being prepared in advance can really help on the day.
Be nice!
Try to swerve family conflict by ignoring any grumbles that surface throughout the day, and make a point of being a nice visitor. At dinner, take modest servings of everything and compliment the cook. Practise your ‘it’s lovely!’ face for when opening presents, and if you feel your stress levels rising, remember this is just one day in the entire year.
Try to swerve family conflict by ignoring any grumbles that surface throughout the day, and make a point of being a nice visitor. At dinner, take modest servings of everything and compliment the cook. Practise your ‘it’s lovely!’ face for when opening presents, and if you feel your stress levels rising, remember this is just one day in the entire year.
Leave your own house tidy
If coming home could be the highlight of your Christmas, make sure you leave it looking as neat as a pin. Put up a few Christmas decorations before you depart to stay with family so the festive spirit continues once you’re back. You could even squirrel away a few homecoming gifts for you and your immediate family to enjoy quietly together once you’re home.
Browse more beautiful interiors styled for Christmas
If coming home could be the highlight of your Christmas, make sure you leave it looking as neat as a pin. Put up a few Christmas decorations before you depart to stay with family so the festive spirit continues once you’re back. You could even squirrel away a few homecoming gifts for you and your immediate family to enjoy quietly together once you’re home.
Browse more beautiful interiors styled for Christmas
Take a break
Christmas Day itself can involve a lot of time over-indulging and squashed up with family on too-small sofas. It can feel a tad claustrophobic sometimes, so don’t forget to factor in a bit of time out. Go for a walk, sneak off for a bath, creep upstairs for a nap or even volunteer to wash up if it allows you to take five in the kitchen quietly.
Christmas Day itself can involve a lot of time over-indulging and squashed up with family on too-small sofas. It can feel a tad claustrophobic sometimes, so don’t forget to factor in a bit of time out. Go for a walk, sneak off for a bath, creep upstairs for a nap or even volunteer to wash up if it allows you to take five in the kitchen quietly.
Create a diversion
If family niggles are beginning to surface, be ready to distract everyone. Pack some goodies from home that might help, including games or a film that everyone will enjoy. Got a cute dog? Take him or her along too – it may provide some welcome light relief. ‘Oh look, everyone, Barney’s stolen a roast potato!’
If family niggles are beginning to surface, be ready to distract everyone. Pack some goodies from home that might help, including games or a film that everyone will enjoy. Got a cute dog? Take him or her along too – it may provide some welcome light relief. ‘Oh look, everyone, Barney’s stolen a roast potato!’
Bring a piece of home
Do as actors or pop divas do on tour, and smuggle something along that reminds you of home. It might be a beautiful decoration, a scented candle, your favourite pillow or a box of indulgent Christmas chocolates. Sometimes, it’s the little things that make a big difference…
Your turn
How do you ensure Christmas spent with family goes with a festive swing? Share your tips in the Comments below, like this story, save the images to inspire your own merry decorations, and join the conversation.
More
Need more Christmas inspiration? Read Many Happy Returns: How to Host a Plastic-Free Christmas
Do as actors or pop divas do on tour, and smuggle something along that reminds you of home. It might be a beautiful decoration, a scented candle, your favourite pillow or a box of indulgent Christmas chocolates. Sometimes, it’s the little things that make a big difference…
Your turn
How do you ensure Christmas spent with family goes with a festive swing? Share your tips in the Comments below, like this story, save the images to inspire your own merry decorations, and join the conversation.
More
Need more Christmas inspiration? Read Many Happy Returns: How to Host a Plastic-Free Christmas
Not just literally, but emotionally, too. Accept your host’s house rules and accommodate any kinks and quirks in the way they live. Sure, it might not be how you’d do it back home, but for a short time it’s more important to acknowledge your host’s efforts and enjoy Christmas their way.