Decorating
How to Cohabit When Your Styles Totally Clash
If you've recently moved in with a partner who doesn't share your style, this guide could help you avoid some home decorating heartbreak
You may be sickeningly compatible in almost every way – you have the same attitude to money, share a passion for Japanese food, and both have a penchant for crime drama – but your interior design styles are worlds apart. Perhaps you love bold colour and your partner’s reluctant to stray beyond the neutrals page of the paint brochure, or worse, you’re moving in with someone who’s attached to a mishmash of ‘collectables’ with which they could never part.
Check out these ideas for compromises – they may just stop you calling in the divorce lawyer!
Check out these ideas for compromises – they may just stop you calling in the divorce lawyer!
Have a purge party for two
Get your bin bags at the ready and set aside a day to purge your home. If you haven’t used it in the last two years, bin it, sell it, or donate it. And to make the task more palatable, agree to spend any proceeds on a fun shared activity – a meal out, massage for two or weekend away perhaps.
Be ruthless but fair, adopting a ‘you chuck, I chuck’ policy, so the sacrifices aren’t all one-sided.
Why you should clear out the clutter
Get your bin bags at the ready and set aside a day to purge your home. If you haven’t used it in the last two years, bin it, sell it, or donate it. And to make the task more palatable, agree to spend any proceeds on a fun shared activity – a meal out, massage for two or weekend away perhaps.
Be ruthless but fair, adopting a ‘you chuck, I chuck’ policy, so the sacrifices aren’t all one-sided.
Why you should clear out the clutter
Find a sofa that suits you both
The sofa is a key item in any home. Luckily, there are so many designs out there you should be able to find one you both love.
If you’re fans of the eclectic trend for mixing up different sofas and chairs, you could even combine two different sofas within your theme. And if one of you favours comfort, while the other is all about style, how about a velvet chesterfield – the shabby kind that’s both squishy and elegant at the same time?
The sofa is a key item in any home. Luckily, there are so many designs out there you should be able to find one you both love.
If you’re fans of the eclectic trend for mixing up different sofas and chairs, you could even combine two different sofas within your theme. And if one of you favours comfort, while the other is all about style, how about a velvet chesterfield – the shabby kind that’s both squishy and elegant at the same time?
Blend contemporary and traditional
If one of you favours clean lines and sleek surfaces, with everything hidden neatly away, while the other loves collecting vintage treasures, you can still find a happy medium. Let the contemporary lover have their way with clean white walls, a simple modern sofa, and a wall of plentiful storage to which you can add a few select pieces.
Or what about having a ‘vintage corner’, perfect in an L-shaped room, where smaller knick-knacks can be displayed?
If one of you favours clean lines and sleek surfaces, with everything hidden neatly away, while the other loves collecting vintage treasures, you can still find a happy medium. Let the contemporary lover have their way with clean white walls, a simple modern sofa, and a wall of plentiful storage to which you can add a few select pieces.
Or what about having a ‘vintage corner’, perfect in an L-shaped room, where smaller knick-knacks can be displayed?
Learn to love what they love
There will always be one ‘ugly’ (in your opinion) item that your other half would risk life and limb to rescue if the house were on fire. But remember that ugly ducklings can become swans.
Could it be reupholstered or repainted? Would a few well-placed cushions disguise its hideousness, or could different handles or legs give it a new lease of life? A sheepskin is a great option thrown over a chair with upholstery that’s seen better days, transforming it into something like this gorgeous specimen pictured.
There will always be one ‘ugly’ (in your opinion) item that your other half would risk life and limb to rescue if the house were on fire. But remember that ugly ducklings can become swans.
Could it be reupholstered or repainted? Would a few well-placed cushions disguise its hideousness, or could different handles or legs give it a new lease of life? A sheepskin is a great option thrown over a chair with upholstery that’s seen better days, transforming it into something like this gorgeous specimen pictured.
Avoid the TV spat
When it comes to televisions, invariably one person wants a huge 60-incher and the other would prefer a dainty model half that size. A 45-inch TV is the obvious compromise, but there are plenty of other options too. Disguise it in a cabinet with sliding doors or create a recess in the chimney breast above your fireplace, so the TV can be hidden by a picture when not in use.
More ways to blend in your TV
When it comes to televisions, invariably one person wants a huge 60-incher and the other would prefer a dainty model half that size. A 45-inch TV is the obvious compromise, but there are plenty of other options too. Disguise it in a cabinet with sliding doors or create a recess in the chimney breast above your fireplace, so the TV can be hidden by a picture when not in use.
More ways to blend in your TV
Navigate the carpet vs wood quandary
One of you loves carpet and the other will only consider a wooden floor. How about compromising with carpet in the bedrooms and wood in the living room? Or opting for wood throughout, but with the carpet-lover getting a free choice on all the super-sized rugs to make the space homey and the floors comfy underfoot?
One of you loves carpet and the other will only consider a wooden floor. How about compromising with carpet in the bedrooms and wood in the living room? Or opting for wood throughout, but with the carpet-lover getting a free choice on all the super-sized rugs to make the space homey and the floors comfy underfoot?
Make room for musical instruments
Musical instruments are often wonderfully crafted objects, so if one of you plays, try to view it not as clutter that’s spoiling your carefully thought-out scheme, but as a thing of beauty that can be incorporated into it.
A moveable instrument, such as a guitar, violin or saxophone, could actually be hung on the wall or given its own special shelf or glass-fronted cabinet.
Find your perfect piano match
Musical instruments are often wonderfully crafted objects, so if one of you plays, try to view it not as clutter that’s spoiling your carefully thought-out scheme, but as a thing of beauty that can be incorporated into it.
A moveable instrument, such as a guitar, violin or saxophone, could actually be hung on the wall or given its own special shelf or glass-fronted cabinet.
Find your perfect piano match
Pick your battles
Sometimes your styles are such polar opposites that designing a room together seems like an impossibility. Instead, agree to collaborate and compromise on the room in which you’ll be spending most time – most likely the living room or kitchen/dining room – and give each other free rein to furnish another room apiece.
Sometimes your styles are such polar opposites that designing a room together seems like an impossibility. Instead, agree to collaborate and compromise on the room in which you’ll be spending most time – most likely the living room or kitchen/dining room – and give each other free rein to furnish another room apiece.
Remember the joy of teamwork
Arguably the perfect partner is someone who doesn’t care about interior design or DIY and is happy to let you get on with it or call in the pros. Yes, you’d get your own way without having to compromise, but think about what you’d miss – a sounding board, a second opinion, a good laugh when you mess it all up.
There’s nothing more satisfying than sitting on the front step after a hard day’s DIY graft, covered from head to toe in dust, eating takeaway fish and chips with the one you love.
TELL US
Does your style totally clash with your partner’s – and have you found ways around it? Share your stories and tips in the Comments below.
MORE
Balancing Act: Designing a His and Hers Bedroom
Telltale Signs You Live in a Share House
Design Lessons My Mother Taught Me
Arguably the perfect partner is someone who doesn’t care about interior design or DIY and is happy to let you get on with it or call in the pros. Yes, you’d get your own way without having to compromise, but think about what you’d miss – a sounding board, a second opinion, a good laugh when you mess it all up.
There’s nothing more satisfying than sitting on the front step after a hard day’s DIY graft, covered from head to toe in dust, eating takeaway fish and chips with the one you love.
TELL US
Does your style totally clash with your partner’s – and have you found ways around it? Share your stories and tips in the Comments below.
MORE
Balancing Act: Designing a His and Hers Bedroom
Telltale Signs You Live in a Share House
Design Lessons My Mother Taught Me
Shacked up with a colour-phobe? You may well have to rein in your more out-there chromatic urges and shelve that idea of combining tartan wallpaper with a bright pink feature wall.
Why not go along with their cautious leanings and agree to a neutral base, on the proviso you’ll be allowed to introduce a few accent colours through accessories in a mutually agreeable shade?