I'm not 100% sure what you're asking, but if you're looking for suggestions whether to make the lower cabinets grey and the upper cabinets white or vice versa, then I would be tempted to make the lower cabinets grey. I think this would help to make the ceiling feel higher and the overall space larger and brighter. But, it may depend upon what style you're going for, whether you have an island benchtop and, if so, what material/colour will be on the rear/exposed side of the island benchtop, the amount of natural lighting, etc. You can easily search through Houzz photos by room, size, colour, materials, etc. Here are a few examples I found from a quick search which may help:

If your painting the cupboards, I would paint them in Dulux Whisper white. The bench tops I would get granite transformations in and choose the lightest grey from your slate. Backsplash I would also keep light, maybe a light grey or soft khaki subway tile. There is no need to add something to bring the dark colour from the floor, plenty of white kitchens with dark floors. I have used granite transformations before, they basically come in and built a nice crisp stone bench top, squaring of the edges etc...too easy. With regards to cupboards, I would stay away from creamy whites . If your painting the cupboards, that involves a lot of prep work and undercoating. Buy sample pots, paint on large pieces of cardboard, then when your happy with the colour just get the undercoat tinted in the colour you like...then if you still think it needs changing it’s easy. Also I would paint in satin, not gloss.

I’d go with timber or cork. Cork is great in a kitchen. Easy on your feet and joints and things are much less likely to break if you drop them. Especially as you age, tiles cause fatigue if you are standing in the kitchen for too long. Cork is now available in lots of different colours and styles including charcoals and greys that might compliment your slate. It’s not all 80s orange. Of course timber can look great too. Just make sure it’s ok for kitchen use.

Bear in mind you can’t put vinyl straight over tiles as it will settle into the grout lines. You will need to add a self leveling screed.